We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.�
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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