I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
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