New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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