Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
