Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize
