Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
