My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
