I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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