quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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