in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize