: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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