im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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