Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
