i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
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