It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
He's on the porch naked. Help.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
