WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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