Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
My ass is underappreciated
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
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