we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
