Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
