Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize