Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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