he wants to bone in the snuggie
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Randomize
