A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Randomize
