yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Randomize
