Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
Randomize
