I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Randomize
