you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
