I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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