I must be too annoying 4 u.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
