he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
