He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
is wine microwaveable?
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Randomize
