just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I am naked and annoyed.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Randomize
