just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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