dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
