What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
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