I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Randomize
