11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
Randomize
