there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Can I color on your dick again?
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
