I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
