Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
