I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
