I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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