he wants to bone in the snuggie
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
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