hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
birth control should be required to get into college
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Randomize
