Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
