New low: just hacked my moms facebook
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Randomize
