She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
