I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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