Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
my poor anus
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
