Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Randomize