Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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